Tonight I did a little bit of coaching Jane during her prayer. I'm fairly she understands how to do it, but she hasn't yet said her own prayers, just repeated what we tell her to. So instead, I asked her "what makes you happy?" And her answer filled in the blanks for the first half. For example:
Me: say "Thank you for..."
Jane: Mank you for...
Me: What makes you happy?
Jane: ...uhhhh JESUS!
Me: say "Thank you for Jesus"
Jane: I'm mank you for Jesus. He makes me happy!
Guess who/what else made the list? (I cut it short, I'm sure she'd have gone on forever) In order:
Jesus
Flowers
Lizzy
Becca
Juliana
Joey
Aunt Jena
Yep, we are all going to miss those cousins when they move!! Good thing spring will come shortly after so at least Jane will have flowers.
"Eating" or "Sometimes Moms Take the Wrong Part of Their Job Too Seriously"
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So I've been meaning to write some things on feeding my kiddos since we've been a bit focused on it lately. I posted those two great books a while back but I meant to do a kind of review of them...
Here is me when Jane was 4-5 months old:
Completely and totally wrapped up in the well-being of my baby and figuring out what is absolutely, completely best for her in all things including, sleeping, feeding, playing, eliminating...I was also completely and totally trusting of everything I was told at our pediatrician's office. So when they handed me the Four Month Old Info sheet that discussed how to start solids I gobbled it up. Apparently there was a particular method and approach, a system if you will, to transitioning a kid off of an all milk diet. I like methods and systems.
Initially, I was very patient and all ready to wait until Jane was six months old to start anything (because that's what the paper said!) and then, strange to say, all of my friends who had blogs and babies Jane's age started posting cute pictures of their kiddos starting solids.
And I have to admit I was getting impatient. I wonder if I thought:Man, she's sleeping through the night, smiling and laughing, sitting up...she's not going to crawl for a while. I'm bored. Let's start solids!
Funny because spoon feeding got old REALLY fast.
Anywho, my little handout said all kinds of things about what NOT to give her until she was one, two, twenty-three and a half, and waiting several days in between new foods in case of allergy. I still laugh at how thoroughly I bought the whole thing. Less funny is how I even judged other mom's who hadn't bought into the system. I didn't think anything terrible of them, just "didn't they read the handout?" or "maybe their doctor didn't tell them!" Go ahead, judge me. Laugh at me. It's hilarious now.
I was also participating in this thing out here called ECFE (Early Childhood Family Education). Basically, you pay a fee based on how much you earn and go to class with your kid and other parents who have similar-aged kids and you learn about development and stuff, the kids play together and you make Mommy Friends. I had a particularly rigid (and insane, annoying, and kind of ornery) teacher at this time who spent an entire month of classes talking about the details of feeding. Peel your grapes and quarter them or you are an evil mother! Absolutely no corn, not on the cob, not creamed, not kernels, certainly not popped until they are entering first grade! Nuts are the plague!! Etcetera!!!
So my scrupulousness went on for months. Then I took Jane into her nine month visit and saw the NP that I particularly adore. She basically told me that all that stuff I was told five months ago? Forget it! Throw it out the window! The powers that be have changed their minds, in fact, the research now shows they were probably wrong. You are up against a clock, your child is about to become picky and resistant to trying anything new. Give her everything possible NOW (except the honey). It might already be too late (it was).
That shattered my trust and complacent reliance on my (or anyone's) pediatrician, as well as further undermining my general opinion of doctors and their own opinions of their authority and knowledge. Science is a sham!! I love science (especially science fiction) but anyone that thinks science can discover Truth is deluded. That's not how the scientific method works!! (I'm parroting a science professor I had as a sophomore at USU) But that's a blog post for another day.
Anywho--Jane shut down shortly after that and not only stopped trying anything new but drastically limited to what she would eat to about five foods. Those adorable chubby, chubby, cheeks of hers? Entirely made up of cheese sticks and chicken nuggets. Mealtimes became the worst part of the day next only to menu planning. It became more and more ridiculous and I started reading more and more.
Let's speed this story up, shall we?
Here are the mistakes I made with Jane:
- Ever doing any kind of puree or reconstituted cereal flake thing...
- Didn't give her the opportunity to explore her food when she was in the height of that phase at six months or so. You know that whole thing where a six month old will shove anything into their mouth? USE IT! Put every different kind of food you can imagine and let them explore it all. Think how cool it must be for them! Think how I deprived Jane of that and now those new, cool textures and flavors are so scary because she doesn't have those formative experiences.
- Primarily spoon feeding and wresting control of feeding from her. I think a little spoon feeding is OK. But let the kid explore! Also, I gave her WAY too big of bites and fed her too fast. Seeing Emiline go at a baby's pace has made that very clear.
- Was way too anal about neatness and food throwing and manners and eating what we gave her and finishing her food and all that. The general feeling that was created around mealtimes was not pleasant and relaxed. I know it was tinged in anxiety for her and still is.
- Letting Eric get all worried and pester her about eating enough and not trusting that she'll eat when she's hungry and not worry if she doesn't (remember those chicken nugget cheeks? Kid is not going to starve anytime soon) We've tried to remedy this by having her ask her tummy if she's hungry or full. It's pretty cute, I'll admit, and it gives her control.
- Giving her too many choices when she was too young (or sometimes any choices). Now we serve what we serve for mealtimes and she either eats it or not. No biggy. Yes, we waste a lot of food. It's temporary. I let her request what she wants throughout the day for snacks (but I no longer offer regular snacks, she was snacking too much during the day, and I think it's good if I let her be in charge of her hunger) and I give her two choices at lunch.
Can I say now how much I LOVE Baby-Led Weaning!! Unfortunately, not tonight. It's passed my bedtime and I promised I'd go to bed early tonight (that's a promise I haven't been able to keep this week!) Stay tuned (some WAY cute baby eating pictures coming up!)
"Spring is in the Air"
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After my swim today, I was sitting in the whirlpool and the other person (an older man near retirement) started up a conversation (strange that older men near retirement always start up conversations in the whirlpool if there are just the two of us. Add a third, and they are silent. Younger men and women of all ages don't feel the need to break the silence...odd, no?).
I didn't understand his words at first, what with all the noisy bubbles and whirling of the pool. He repeated himself and turns out he was only talking about the weather.
"Felt like spring outside today! Spring is in the air!"
Any guesses to how "warm" it was today? Our high was, get ready for it...
I don't think you're ready.
I'm not kidding, you need to be ready for this next bit.
How 'bout now? Are you ready?
OK
The high today was 26 degrees!!!
You non-Minnesotans better be rolling, because I'll tell you what, today was WARM! It felt like jacket weather. No kidding, no sarcasm! I completely agree with the guy, spring is in the air!
I didn't understand his words at first, what with all the noisy bubbles and whirling of the pool. He repeated himself and turns out he was only talking about the weather.
"Felt like spring outside today! Spring is in the air!"
Any guesses to how "warm" it was today? Our high was, get ready for it...
I don't think you're ready.
I'm not kidding, you need to be ready for this next bit.
How 'bout now? Are you ready?
OK
The high today was 26 degrees!!!
You non-Minnesotans better be rolling, because I'll tell you what, today was WARM! It felt like jacket weather. No kidding, no sarcasm! I completely agree with the guy, spring is in the air!
Sharing
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Since our apartment is small, we don't have a lot of playdates at our house. I'm guessing this contributes to Jane's problem with sharing her toys. When we go to Joey's house, she shares his toys great...;-)
Anyway, Joey, Jena, and Gabby came over yesterday while I went to my post-op (had a cyst removed last week. totally benign, just annoying). Before I even left, there were tears about sharing toys. I told Jane that if she couldn't share, she would have to go sit on my bed (normally she has a time out on her bed, but Emiline was taking a nap in their room). I grabbed my socks and shoes and stopped by the bathroom to grab some lotion before I left and glanced in my room on my way out. There was Jane, sitting on my bed, playing with the toys she didn't want Joey to touch... strange the things that child chooses to happily obey...
Anyway, Joey, Jena, and Gabby came over yesterday while I went to my post-op (had a cyst removed last week. totally benign, just annoying). Before I even left, there were tears about sharing toys. I told Jane that if she couldn't share, she would have to go sit on my bed (normally she has a time out on her bed, but Emiline was taking a nap in their room). I grabbed my socks and shoes and stopped by the bathroom to grab some lotion before I left and glanced in my room on my way out. There was Jane, sitting on my bed, playing with the toys she didn't want Joey to touch... strange the things that child chooses to happily obey...
Sharing a favorite blog
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I'm always thrilled when someone shares a favorite blog, so I thought I'd share one of my favorite health/mommy blogs:
Lisa Bryne's
The Well Grounded Life
She's a health coach for moms. I think what I love most about her stuff is that all that health advice and tips, etc is well grounded in a strong foundation. It's not eat this and beat that health problem, but nourish yourself, take care of yourself so you are able to take the kind of care you want to of others.
Anyway,
I just listened to one of her free webinars. Here's the link:
Event: January 24 11 AM Eastern
Here are some of my notes:
Change always happens from the inside out--based on your relationship with yourself.
There is a difference between acting like the person you want to be and becoming the person you want to be.
The goal is never to be perfect. Airplanes don't and can't fly a straight course from A to B. But they do have to stay focused on the destination, constantly adjusting the course. We are the same.
And then she shared an experience where she found herself, throughout the day, giving these "noisy" prayers to God: "help me be more patient" "I need to stay calm" "give me the will power" (she probably had a toddler at the time!) And she decided instead to pray to feel God's love for her instead. After experiencing that, she was in a place to see herself in such a way that she could act the way she wanted to act because she could see who she was and who she was becoming...yeah, she said it a whole lot better.
But I've heard, and at times balk at and at other times embrace the whole "love yourself first" bit. She brought it back to the scriptures where the second great commandment is to love your neighbor as yourself. She pointed out you can't authentically love your neighbor unless you do love yourself. That all your relationships with others mirror your relationship with yourself. That made a whole lot of sense. So why not tap into that God's love stuff to love yourself better?
Yeah, I'm really, really, tired tonight. I couldn't justify falling asleep before 9:00, even though I really wanted to. Now that I've done a bit of self-work and introspection I can go to bed. Turns out I really need to do introspection on a daily basis. Keeps me happy. Keeps me whole. Got to know yourself to love yourself, right?
G'night.
Lisa Bryne's
The Well Grounded Life
She's a health coach for moms. I think what I love most about her stuff is that all that health advice and tips, etc is well grounded in a strong foundation. It's not eat this and beat that health problem, but nourish yourself, take care of yourself so you are able to take the kind of care you want to of others.
Anyway,
I just listened to one of her free webinars. Here's the link:
Event: January 24 11 AM Eastern
Here are some of my notes:
Change always happens from the inside out--based on your relationship with yourself.
There is a difference between acting like the person you want to be and becoming the person you want to be.
The goal is never to be perfect. Airplanes don't and can't fly a straight course from A to B. But they do have to stay focused on the destination, constantly adjusting the course. We are the same.
And then she shared an experience where she found herself, throughout the day, giving these "noisy" prayers to God: "help me be more patient" "I need to stay calm" "give me the will power" (she probably had a toddler at the time!) And she decided instead to pray to feel God's love for her instead. After experiencing that, she was in a place to see herself in such a way that she could act the way she wanted to act because she could see who she was and who she was becoming...yeah, she said it a whole lot better.
But I've heard, and at times balk at and at other times embrace the whole "love yourself first" bit. She brought it back to the scriptures where the second great commandment is to love your neighbor as yourself. She pointed out you can't authentically love your neighbor unless you do love yourself. That all your relationships with others mirror your relationship with yourself. That made a whole lot of sense. So why not tap into that God's love stuff to love yourself better?
Yeah, I'm really, really, tired tonight. I couldn't justify falling asleep before 9:00, even though I really wanted to. Now that I've done a bit of self-work and introspection I can go to bed. Turns out I really need to do introspection on a daily basis. Keeps me happy. Keeps me whole. Got to know yourself to love yourself, right?
G'night.
Blogging Break
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I've been on a bit of a blogging break, if you didn't notice. Despite all the cynics and idealists, I do happen to find renewal in the New Year, when I can. Hasn't happened for a few years but sure did this year. I was able to go home to my parent's house for three weeks. I came home deeply refreshed. Before, my to do list made me weary, exhausted, and depressed. After, my to do list made me excited, exhausted, and impatient (to get it all done). We'll see how long that lasts...;-)
With the New Year, I decided to eliminate a lot of things from my life and then add the essentials in one by one. So far, so good (even though my sister's Christmas gift to me-a Roku box to stream Netflix-has created some challenges with it's dazzling temptations of oh-so-many documentaries, sci-fi, and obscure musicals to explore). I really hope I've been setting a good foundation for a fantastic year. And I think it's time to start blogging again. Let's see how I'll do at catching up...
Happy 2011!
With the New Year, I decided to eliminate a lot of things from my life and then add the essentials in one by one. So far, so good (even though my sister's Christmas gift to me-a Roku box to stream Netflix-has created some challenges with it's dazzling temptations of oh-so-many documentaries, sci-fi, and obscure musicals to explore). I really hope I've been setting a good foundation for a fantastic year. And I think it's time to start blogging again. Let's see how I'll do at catching up...
Happy 2011!
Jane's "Bwooze"
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Last weekend I took the girls over to my sisters to babysit and spend time with my nieces and nephew on a Friday night so my sis and her hubby could go out. I'm eager to spend time with them as they are moving away in about a month ;-( And we had a really good time, even though the girls where completely exhausted. We got home about 9:30, which wasn't too big of a deal because we weren't totally adjusted from Mountain Time.
It was really, really cold, despite the fresh snow we'd had earlier that day. And Jane tends to cry when we are outside and it's below freezing. She learned to put her hands in her pockets and she loves doing that. I don't know how much it helps but it at least distracts her. So we had two exhausted, cold, kiddos, coming up the front steps to the apartment building. Jane had been more unsteady on her feet then usual (we found out a few days later she had a sinus infection) and she wanted Eric (I was parking the car) to "hold you!" (love how that pronoun is still confused, otherwise she'd seem too grown up). The heat of the entry turned the snow tracked on the tile into some lovely, slippery slush just inside the door and Jane went down fast.
Interestingly, the bump on her head didn't show up til the next day. That night she had a pretty awesome bloody nose. Eric took care of it and he did amazing! She wanted her Daddy and he did great. After the bleeding stopped, she went right to bed (didn't realize she'd hit her head, or we might have been more worried). The next day the goose egg on her "pointy head" (that's what Jane calls all foreheads) was had it's own goose egg and zip code. It was bad. And swollen. But not very colorful. The next day it got darker and the day after that the bridge of her nose swelled up and the black eyes appeared.
Everywhere we go people ask about it. And everywhere we go I feel like I have to explain in detail so people know I'm not a bad mom ;-) Jane's gotten really good at telling people about her "bwooze." She hits the highlights- it doesn't hurt, she had her hands in her pockets, she fell down, her nose "got bleed," and now she has a "bwooze" on her eyes.
We did go to the doc, btw (remember the sinus infection?) and they said that it looked totally normal and typical. Poor kid got roughed up a bit in the waiting room while running around with a more steady and active toddler. He pushed her in play and she went sailing into a metal chair. Ended up with a bleeding lip and a chunk of skin hanging from her mouth. She had a rash all over (which is the main reason I had taken her in), the bruised up eyes, bump on the head, swollen nose, runny nose, eye gunk...she looked pretty rough.
Man, I'm glad I'm not a toddler anymore. They sure are tough!
It was really, really cold, despite the fresh snow we'd had earlier that day. And Jane tends to cry when we are outside and it's below freezing. She learned to put her hands in her pockets and she loves doing that. I don't know how much it helps but it at least distracts her. So we had two exhausted, cold, kiddos, coming up the front steps to the apartment building. Jane had been more unsteady on her feet then usual (we found out a few days later she had a sinus infection) and she wanted Eric (I was parking the car) to "hold you!" (love how that pronoun is still confused, otherwise she'd seem too grown up). The heat of the entry turned the snow tracked on the tile into some lovely, slippery slush just inside the door and Jane went down fast.
Interestingly, the bump on her head didn't show up til the next day. That night she had a pretty awesome bloody nose. Eric took care of it and he did amazing! She wanted her Daddy and he did great. After the bleeding stopped, she went right to bed (didn't realize she'd hit her head, or we might have been more worried). The next day the goose egg on her "pointy head" (that's what Jane calls all foreheads) was had it's own goose egg and zip code. It was bad. And swollen. But not very colorful. The next day it got darker and the day after that the bridge of her nose swelled up and the black eyes appeared.
Everywhere we go people ask about it. And everywhere we go I feel like I have to explain in detail so people know I'm not a bad mom ;-) Jane's gotten really good at telling people about her "bwooze." She hits the highlights- it doesn't hurt, she had her hands in her pockets, she fell down, her nose "got bleed," and now she has a "bwooze" on her eyes.
We did go to the doc, btw (remember the sinus infection?) and they said that it looked totally normal and typical. Poor kid got roughed up a bit in the waiting room while running around with a more steady and active toddler. He pushed her in play and she went sailing into a metal chair. Ended up with a bleeding lip and a chunk of skin hanging from her mouth. She had a rash all over (which is the main reason I had taken her in), the bruised up eyes, bump on the head, swollen nose, runny nose, eye gunk...she looked pretty rough.
Man, I'm glad I'm not a toddler anymore. They sure are tough!
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